My mother is a wonderful, wonderful woman. I love and respect her; I miss her every day and wish we didn’t live 2,000 miles apart. But it’s clear from my pop culture proclivities that I was actually raised by television. The moms of sitcoms and dramas have provided me with at least as much relationship, life, and fashion advice as the woman who lovingly shoved me out of her uterus 25 and a half years ago, and I would give back to them if I could. Tomorrow is the day that you’re supposed to make grand gestures, to show your moms you truly appreciate them. If I could, I would give the following 10 TV moms these gifts to show my gratitude.
1.) Peggy Bundy
The only appropriate gift for a woman whose hair is as big as her heart and as finely styled as her comebacks: Bumble and bumble Prêt-à-Powder. Give your mom the gift of texture and peerless volume.
2.) Lorelai Gilmore
A gold and orange eyeshadow duo, like NARS Duo Eyeshadow in Mediteranee, is the perfect complementary shade to make baby blue peepers pop. However, given her beautiful brown locks and obsession with coffee, I can’t think of anything more appropriate than Organix Mocha Espresso Shampoo and Conditioner for brunettes.
3.) Nancy Botwin
The clear choice for a woman with a “green” thumb, The Body Shop’s Hemp Body Butter. This rich moisturizer soothes and repairs even the most parched skin.
4.) Morticia Addams
5.) Claire Dunphy
This loveable type-A mom is probably as demanding about her haircare as she is the rest of her life. She’d definitely use Sachajuan Silver Shampoo and Conditioner to maintain her perfect blond locks and keep any hint of brassiness at bay.
6.) Gloria Pritchett
Another Modern Family bombshell, Gloria simply oozes sensuality. A trademark perfume of spicy, woody notes like YSL Opium is right up her alley.
7.) Betty Draper
Is there anything more classically feminine than Chanel’s timeless fragrance Coco Mademoiselle? I think not. Betty wouldn’t settle for anything less.
8.) Carmela Soprano
Carmella handles the challenges of being a mom with strength, if not always with grace. Despite the hurdles her husband and children throw her way, her manicure maintains its flawless finish. I’m positive she uses Seche Vite topcoat to keep her nails shiny and chip-free.
9.) Reba McEntire
This busy single mom needs a camera-ready dry shampoo at a drugstore price point. Batiste Hint of Color Dry Shampoo in Vibrant & Red will give her sky-high country girl volume without leaving any white residue in her signature red locks.
10.) Lucille Bluth
The original baddest bitch is all about the finer things in life. She doesn’t let her four children slow down her lifestyle of hard drinking and easy living. Her champagne tastes will tolerate nothing less than Guerlain Shalimar. This (plus a bottle of gin) would surely clinch your spot as her least disappointing child.