I love travel. I love reconnecting with my family and friends. But these things require putting on a bra and leaving the comfort of my own couch. When it comes down to it, the creature comforts of home (namely, bralessness, pantlessness, and a steady supply of Nutella) truly can’t be beat. After a week of eating and drinking and family and drinking and friends and eating (and did I mention eating?) in Chicago, I’m so glad to be back home in Seattle–sleeping in my own bed, pooping in my own toilet, living the dream.
I’m also excited for the start of December–a month of holiday cheer, generosity, endless possibilities, peppermint lattés, gift-giving, gigantic tins of chocolate fudge, awkward drunken family parties, awkward drunken office parties, and (saving the best for last) my review of empty products from last month!
elf Eyebrow Duo in Medium: I don’t even have an empty to show for this, because I replaced it immediately and accidentally discarded the old packaging before taking a picture. It’s a fairly standard duo with brow powder on one side and brow wax on the other, all for roughly the price of a cup of coffee ($3 USD). The included brush is (surprisingly) not totally useless, you can buy it at Target while you’re picking up sports bras and gelato (what? no? is that just me?) and it does the job. I had previously used the duo in Light, but Medium is a better match for my newly auburn hair. Real talk–this product is not going to stand up to the competition of Laura Mercier’s brow powder duo or Anastasia’s pomade, but elf Eybrow Duo punches far above its weight in terms of cost:quality ratio.
Aveda Shampure shampoo: I use this on my hair. I occasionally use it as a makeup brush cleaner. In a pinch, I’ve even drafted this gentle cleanser for double duty when hand-washing my lacy unmentionables. So, if you have hair, if you use makeup brushes, or if you need to wash some delicate underthings, you too could benefit from owning this marvelous multitasker.
Nivea Creme: Good ol’ true blue. I keep a large tub of this in my bathroom and a smaller tin in my purse to calm my dry, cracked hands (and soothe the scales from my infamously hobbit-esque feet). Every winter, I run through this shit like Matt Forte circa 2013. It’s a faithful stand-by with a uniquely familiar scent, sure to keep your parched winter skin woes at bay.
Prestogeorge Herbal Detox Loose Leaf Tea: Max and I received this tea from his sister (a Pittsburgh local) and I am gleefully, impatiently, eagerly awaiting my next shipment from Prestogeorge. Pro-tip: even if you’re not into “detox” teas (what exactly are they detoxifying??? of what toxins do you speak? DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE FUNCTIONS OF THE LIVER AND KIDNEYS???) they are usually caffeine-free, which makes them suitable for some late-night steep-and-sip action. This one tastes phenomenal and contains cinnamon, ginger, and dandelion.
Paula’s Choice RESIST C15 Super Booster: Sometimes the snow comes down in June, sometimes the sun goes ’round the moon, and (much like the object of Vanessa Williams’s affection) I always save the best for last. I have been using this serum for about 2 years (repurchasing several times along the way), but words still escape me when trying to describe this nectar of the epidermal gods. It’s downright magical. It brightens my complexion, it fades PIH like whoa, it contains the same active ingredients as SkinCeuticals C E Ferulic serum at less than 1/3 the cost. And it’s currently 15% off. This antioxidant wunderware has the characteristic odor of Vitamin C (like a mixture lunchmeat and old pennies, but sort of in a good way?) so you know it’s doing is freckle-fading, age-defying thang.